By Jeeves: Lyrics To The 'Lost' Songs

The lyrics on this page are published with permission by Alan Ayckbourn and should not be reproduced or stored in any form without the permission of the copyright holder.

The Code Of The Woosters

The Code Of The Woosters was present in both Jeeves and By Jeeves (although slightly altered for the latter). It was the first complete song of the show and introduced Bertie and his code of honour and why he feels he must help his friends in their hour of need.
The song was part of
By Jeeves during both its original Scarborough run and then its London transfer. However, when the play was staged in America for the first time that same year, it was replaced by Wooster Will Entertain You. Largely covering the same ground, but in a shorter space of time, it was intended to move the musical along quicker into the actual plot. This song was then retitled Never Fear by the time it opened on Broadway in 2001.
The lyrics below are for the
By Jeeves version of The Code Of The Woosters.

Bertie:
I obey
The Code of the Woosters
It's a simple philosophy.
When perhaps a chap's in trouble
I respond with alacrity.

And if my fellow men have problems
Whatever they might be
They call on me
The sterling Wooster B.

For despite this easy nature
Come the evening when battle dawns
What a sight to see a Wooster
Grab the livestock by both the horns.

For when a Wooster's mask of pleasure
Becomes a steely stare.
You know he's there.
He'll never turn a hair.

What would a chap do without it?
How would he get through without it?
How could he stay true without the Code of the Woosters?
If you're at sea, I shall be there, even put off tea to be there,
Woosters have sum oceans for the Code of -
Allegiance duly owed for the Wooster Code.
What a load.

If a girl is in the doldrums
Not a paddle to her name.
I'll be there though frankly speaking
Womanising's not my game.
But if she's really in a lather,
Wild eyed and hat askew
He'll see her through
Old you know who....

Whenever it calls, can't ignore it, Even give up Ascot for it
Woosters have died gladly for the Code of -
For that rugged, heavy load called the Wooster Code -
What a load.
Take my card
In case you need me, if you're jousting a losing cause,
Like the chap who wins the double
I can battle the natural laws -

So if you're eaten up with anguish
I'll snatch you from its jaws
No second's pause
From one sincerely yours -

It's alright!
He's on call both day and night,
Turning darkness into light -
Ubique Illuminatus
Wooster is ready to fight!
Wooster is ready to fight!

Copyright: Alan Ayckbourn. Please do not reproduce without permission of the copyright holder.